You can’t just look at someone and tell if they’re struggling with an eating disorder or not.
As I prepare for my speaking engagement about eating disorders and athletes, I have been having this thought (fear!) in regard to these young people I’ll soon address:
They might think that eating disordered behaviors and thoughts are normal.
Let’s think about that for a minute. What I’m saying is that the thoughts of wanting to become smaller, fitter, and more appealing are WIDESPREAD… and the behaviors a person will engage in to achieve those things, are normal. Read More
Last time I talked about doing away with a gym and competitive exercise. No calorie counting, no timers, no pace goals, no super-fit competitor on the machine next to me…
I’d say it’s been almost two years since I have been a part of a regular gym. On occasion, I pop into local fitness classes or college weight rooms to escape the weather or mix things up… but as a regular gym enthusiast (and because I still see so many benefits in exercise!), I found my stride at home and in the great outdoors. Read More
I struggled for a long time with exercise, and it came as a surprise in all the different ways I did: too much, too little, no motivation, a lot of motivation with an asterisk* (from my exercise addiction days)… finding a balance was difficult not only in my body and schedule but (mostly) in my mind. Read More
“You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.” ― C. JoyBell C.
Are you a fitness-/calorie-/step-/mile-counter? Do you have all the gadgets and/or have a log for all these things? I’m seriously interested in how these work for you and how you use them to your advantage…
I’m going to talk to you about my struggles with numbers – with exercise and food – and steps I’ve taken to lose the calculations that drove me crazy for so long. Here’goes! Read More
“People can start out one way, and by the time life gets through with them, they end up completely different.” (~Sue Monk Kidd)
I think there’s this misconception out there about having an eating disorder… You might be thinking about all the ways a person looks, am I right?
They’re emaciated and bony, tired-looking with gaunt facial features, you think. Sometimes, you’re right. But a lot of times, you’re not.
When I entered treatment for anorexia, I was only 70-percent of my “ideal” body weight, as opposed to the at least 85-percent my treatment team desired. I understood that there would many many types of people there, but I figured they’d all look like I did, too – which was, underweight, timid, and tired of it all.
But, I was surprised that many people suffering alongside me looked… normal. And, they weren’t about to discharge either. They were also in the thick of their fight. Read More
The feature photo of this post is me, sitting in the same tree in Portland, Oregon, first in 2006, and then in 2011.
I had a therapist who gave me assignments all the time and one of them was to write my own eulogy… for my funeral. She showed me how I was killing myself and people were distancing themselves from me to make it easier when I did die.
It was true, I felt alone in my fight, that no one cared if I stayed Earthside or not. Now, I realize that it was exhausting and people really didn’t know how else to help if I couldn’t help myself.
In the eulogy, I thought about all the things I would want someone to say about me, and I was hopeful that people would understand… Read More